Monkey Mystery Code Cracked

Last week's apparent kidnapping and ransom demand was an apparent hoax to shake down the monkeys' owners for payment, requested in unmarked Chiquita bananas by the bushel.

"I can't believe they would do such a thing," exclamed Sasha Laine,* gazing vacantly off into the distance. "I mean, they know we only buy organic Dole produce."

The monkeys, Clyde and Bonzai, have been detained by animal control and are being held at an undisclosed location. Both were found sipping banana daquiris by the clubhouse pool a mere 100 yards down the street from where the alleged kidnapping took place. Both have previous arrest warrants in New York's FAO Shwartz and Los Angeles' Toy R' Us for lude monkey business and alleged horse play.

*Name changed to protect identity. Actually, she was incredibly embarassed that monkeys could fool her obviously stronger mental stability.